im gay
i know
yea but for you.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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