So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
every time fb tells me a dude i fucked is now friends with another dude ive fucked, i die a little inside. thats way more honesty than im comfortable with.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
