you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Randomize
