So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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