guys are not supposed to queef...right?
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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