just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize