A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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