he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
