The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
i've created a new STD.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
