just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
