we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
