Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
