I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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