I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
