brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
need another drink. this is the easiest way
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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