it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
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