That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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