I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
