i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
Randomize
