Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
