So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I have feelings that need drinking.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
