the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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