Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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