Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
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he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
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I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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