I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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