Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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