Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
