what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
We are all done wearing pants today
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
