they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
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I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
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I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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