just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
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