evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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