We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize