i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
