I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
God I need to hump something, right now.
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
