Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Randomize