I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
