okay pat passed out under dana's car
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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