there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize