after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
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