I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I just got baptized.
Drunkenly skinny dipping in a indoor hotel pool is not okay and does not count as a baptism.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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