That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
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