The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
My dad just came home, said hi to mom and me in the kitchen, and then said "I'm gonna go inject my blood with iguana saliva".
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
