I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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