Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
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I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
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In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
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