My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Randomize
