I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
4 words: hood of his car
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Randomize
