It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
