I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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