let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
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