just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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